The Loss of the Greatest Generation

National World War II Memorial in Washington, D.C.
http://www.wwiimemorial.com/....
Photo by Richard Lato

It was with great sadness that I learned that my Mom's neighbor Tony died this afternoon, less than seven weeks since another one went on to achieve his own reward in Heaven.  Let's take them in reverse order....

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Here is an edited combination of two of my Facebook status updates from February 7^th and 8^th:

Bob lived across the hall from my Mom for the last couple of years. It used to be the case that I would participate in a card game with my Mom and her neighbors, but was not really a constructive way to spend time with her, as a few of them began to make *everything* increasingly unpleasant.  I have not made much secret of the fact that my Mom's neighbors can be quite challenging. Some of them have represented to me the embodiments of unreasonable viewpoints, the devastation of memory, profound loneliness marked by the need to talk constantly - everything I dread becoming.

Seal of the United States Navy
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/United_States_Navy
Public Domain

Not Bob though. He was a terrific story teller and was very funny.  A World War II veteran of the United States Navy, Bob was the consummate gentleman, funny, and a sharp dresser - everything one hopes to be - and although he was 88 years old, he never particularly struck me as an "old man."

The last year was tough on Bob, but he maintained his spirits, and he never took people down by discussing his condition in graphic detail.

I learned on Wednesday (February 6, 2013) that Bob passed away. He shall be greatly missed by many people.

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Tony lived just down the hall from my Mom with his wife of over sixty  years, Marlene.  In spite of that, I didn't get to know him as well as Bob, but I liked and respected him based upon our limited interactions and whatever stories my Mom shared.  She has been helping to clean their apartment once a week for several years, giving her the opportunity to know both of them very well.

Seal of the United States Army
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/United_States_Army
Public Domain

I, on the other hand, would run into Tony occasionally as he traveled the length of the hallway from his apartment to the mailboxes.  He was always cheerful and would ask me how I was doing, and no matter what my personal situation was, I would always greet him cordially and  tell him that everything was fine.  Similar to Bob, Tony was always well-dressed and charming, and I liked him because something about him reminded me of my own Uncle Bruce, and at the age of 94, he too defied the stereotypical "old man," apart from his walker.  As we chatted briefly in the hallway, Tony would tell me to say "Hi" to my Mom (which I often forgot to do), and that would be the end of it.  

Just as I wrote about in in my entry dated December 7, 2012, however, I have learned that there was much more to this man that met the eye.

Tony was a veteran of the campaign in Italy serving as a captain in the US Army, 88th Infantry Division "Fighting Blue Devils."  In addition to being a husband, he was a father, grandfather, and great-grandfather.  

Marlene went out to lunch today with their son Mike, and when the two of them returned, they found Tony in his chair, having passed away peacefully.  Since he had not been sick, this came as a complete surprise.  Sure, he was 94, but he seemed perfectly healthy.  My Mom is torn apart and Marlene is understandably in shock.  I am going to miss seeing him in the hallway and wish that I had gotten to know him better.

Flag of the United States
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Flag_of_the_United_States
Public Domain

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My Mom has other neighbors who were World War II veterans, but a few of them strike me as "crotchety."  The reality, of course, is that they are widowers with a variety of physical ailments, and the world that they helped to create is leaving them in the dust.  As sad as that is, it is difficult to get past all of those filters, and even then, discussions can be littered with comments reeking of sexism, racism, and other ills that make me bristle.  Weighing the value of the non-renewable resource versus some of the complications that come with them is a real mental balancing act.

Do you know members of  the Greatest Generation?  Have you taken time to get to know them, have their personal styles been off-putting to you, or have they not "let you in"?  Please share your comments below.

Brief Update

Executive Recruiter
http://jobs.aol.com/articles/2010/10/11/....
No Copyright Infringement Intended

Much of my time is spent volunteering and networking, with the goal of ultimately finding a paying position that best fits my skill set.  My  true talents lie within the administration of payroll and benefits, accounts payable, accounts receivable, scheduling,  and bookkeeping tasks - my mind is designed to work at its best within the structure that numbers provide.

I spoke with a recruiter on Friday (03/22/2013) about a position  that would utilize my experience, but was ultimately offered another, one that had absolutely nothing whatsoever to do with my strengths.

Both Goodreads and BrainyQuote attribute the following quote to the Chinese philosopher Confucius (551 - 479 BC):

Choose a job you love, and you will never have to work a day in your life.

Let me be honest with you:  this does not seem to me as though it will fall into the "love" category, but I want to give it a shot.  In fact, my exact response was "I would like to have the opportunity to fail, so that I can turn it into the opportunity to succeed."  We'll see what happens.

Have you ever taken on a responsibility knowing that it played more to your weaknesses than to  your strengths?  Please share your thoughts in the comments below.

Schedule Changes, Computer Problems, and Bears! Oh My!

It was my intent to have a blog entry for every day in March, but the last several days have been crazy.  Even though this entry is dated March 22, I am writing on March 27, and in those intervening days, I have lived and developed  several ideas, including commentary about a dramatic schedule change; an alleged Department of Justice warning, or in other words, a virus, that has completely infected one of the several computers that I use; tying myself  up in knots over the unknown; the passing of two World War II veterans whom I had the privilege to meet; and a few more.

Thank you for your readership.  I will be back soon!

Please Stand By
http://www.ivygateblog.com/2011/10/stay-tuned-and-write-for-us/
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Sheer Plandemonium

President Abraham Lincoln, "The Great Emancipator"
Daguerreotype Taken November 8, 1863
Alexander Gardner (1821 - 1882)
Library of Congress Digital File cph.3a53289
http://www.britannica.com/bps/media-view/112498/1/0/0

Although a conspiracy plot ultimately carried out by John Wilkes Booth prematurely and tragically ended the life of one of our nation's greatest presidents, Abraham Lincoln led a life and left a legacy that have secured him virtual immortality.  His measures ensured that our country would be restored after the bitter and divisive Civil War.  With his Emancipation Proclamation, Lincoln extended the promise of freedom to over three million slaves and forged the path toward the thirteenth amendment to the Constitution, outlawing slavery in the United States altogether.

As such, Lincoln is known as "The Great Emancipator."

My personal accomplishments have been microscopic in comparison, but more than likely, so have yours.  To the best of my knowledge, Nelson Mandela and Lech Wałęsa do not read  my blog on a regular basis.  (Confidential to Mister Wałęsa:  Dziękuję.)

One Sharpened Pencil Among Unsharpened Ones
http://www.visualphotos.com/....

In spite of this, we all have our strengths, and one of mine is planning.  I like to anticipate needs and be able to fulfill them completely or defer an activity until I am better prepared.  You might say that I am "The Great Anticipator."

This involves a combination of personal experience, anecdotal evidence, and research.  Take a party, for example:  no one wants to run out of food, but on the other hand, it doesn't do any good to have an overwhelming amount of leftovers either.  Other considerations to take into account might be:  does anyone on the guest list have specific dietary requirements, whether due to allergies or religious observations?  Are there enough places for people to sit?

 

As I wrote in my entry dated March 20 though, quoting Robert Burns,

The best-laid schemes o' mice an' men

Gang aft agley.

A Hansen Family Dinner
There appears to be sufficient seating for everyone
Davey and Goliath
http://www.daveyandgoliath.org/images/....
No Copyright Infringement Intended

As is the way of the world, no amount of planning can take into account the sorts of things that happen at every occasion.  Someone is sick.  Perhaps someone had a little bit too much to drink.  Maybe an unexpected guest comes.  Any number of things can go wrong, and sometimes we need to remind ourselves that "a good plan today is better than a perfect plan tomorrow."  Too much planning can lead to a sort of social paralysis, and it can also lead to disappointment when events take an unexpected turn.

When I was married, I would often find myself on a Tuesday making plans for the upcoming Saturday.  Where would we go?  What would we do?  How early would we have to leave?  As the weekend drew ever nearer, I would become increasingly excited, only to wake up on Saturday morning to find my bride wanting to sleep in.  It was reminiscent of my childhood, when I would want to do things on a Sunday, only to be thwarted by the Minnesota Vikings.  As a direct result of that, I have had a lifelong distaste for football, and for sports in general, but that is finally starting to subside.  So too is my dependence upon the sleep habits of others.  If I want to go somewhere and do something fun, I go!

Are you a planner, or are you more of a spontaneous person?  Please share your thoughts in the comments below.

A Disappointing Attempt to Engage in a Respectful Difference of Opinion

Minnesota State Capitol
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Minnesota_Legislature
Photo Credit:  Wikipedia User Mulad, aka Mike Hicks
Public Domain

I generally try to avoid calling people out by name, but when a public official makes his positions well-known, it seems within reason for me to do so.

At the beginning of February, Dan Hall, the state senator from the Burnsville – Lakeville – Savage area, about thirty miles south of where I live, started following me on Twitter.  This seemed very strange to me, but after corresponding with him, I followed him back.  The topic of same-sex marriage did not come up in our communications at that time for a variety of reasons, primarily because it didn’t even occur to me at the time.  You can only imagine my surprise when I saw him in the news a few weeks later.  

Senator Hall is referenced in this article  http://minnesota.publicradio.org/.... as follows:

The bill includes a specific exemption based on religious beliefs.  But other Republicans said they're still concerned about a potential infringement on their religious liberty.  State Sen. Dan Hall, an ordained minister, said he doesn't want to be forced one day to perform a marriage that he objects to.

"I personally will go to jail before I ever perform a marriage to a homosexual," said Hall, R-Burnsville.

In my entry dated March 18, I shared some of my thoughts regarding same-sex marriage, expressing both love and support for my friends and family members in the LGBT community.  Whenever I publish a blog entry, I send a Tweet, and the one in this instance read:

Love is love. 

matthewmorsecodified.blogspot.com/2013/03/my-thoughts-on-same-sex-marriage.html 

@SenatorDanHall @ScottDibble @ChrisWarcraft #MarriageEquality #StraightAlly

Note that Scott Dibble is the Senate sponsor of the bill that would allow same-sex marriage in the state of Minnesota, and “Chris Warcraft” is Chris Kluwe, the punter for the Minnesota Vikings, who has been very vocal in his support of the issue. 

Late that day, Senator Hall responded:

@MatthewMorse6 @ScottDibble @ChrisWarcraft Not for me.  I love my wife different than my niece.  There are many different kinds of love.

Twitter Symbol
https://twitter.com/twitter
No Copyright Infringement Intended

Although I interpreted the response as immaterial, argumentative,   ridiculous, and insulting to my intelligence, I am loath to engage in an online argument with anyone, much less a politician.  It also raised some questions, which I never posed directly to Senator Hall:  Did you read my blog entry, or did you just reply to my use of the expression "Love is love"? Did you read about the people who are in loving relationships? Did you read about my friends and family? Do you understand how your "Christian" beliefs are hurting others?

I keep very close track of the people with whom I am connected on all of my social media accounts, so it was easy to notice when the counts for both my "Following" and my "Followers" were down by one on Tuesday.  Senator Hall unfollowed and blocked me.  It was never my belief that his mind would change, but the fact that we could not have a respectful disagreement strongly disappointed me.

I sent him one last Tweet:

@SenatorDanHall You unfollowed me and arranged it so that I no longer follow you? Because I have a lesbian cousin? I don't understand.

Senator Hall has to date not responded to me.

Have you ever been involved in a disagreement with a politician? How did you handle it? Please share your comments below.

A Day of Questionable Productivity

Little Mermaid Ariel 02
One of the Google Image results for the term "Insomnia"
Photographer:  ~insomnia-stock (Marianna) on deviantART
http://insomnia-stock.deviantart.com/....
No Copyright Infringement Intended

I had a networking meeting scheduled for Tuesday morning at 9:00 AM.  Based upon the distance, as well as the unknowns of weather and traffic, I wanted to get up at 6:30 AM, so that I would be able to arrive early without having to rush through my prep time.  My goal was to go to bed at 10:30 PM.

As the saying goes,

The best-laid schemes o' mice an' men
Gang aft agley.

My good friends, Agents Rossi and Hotchner of Criminal Minds fame, convinced me to stay up until midnight, and then I was WIDE awake at 3:00 AM.  After tossing and turning for more than thirty minutes, I decided to get up and watch the overnight news on one of the original networks for a laugh, if for nothing else.  Having caught a broadcast recently, I was thoroughly unimpressed with the anchors' demeanor, questioning whether they were delivering news or stand-up comedy.

It's 5:00 Somewhere Neon Sign
http://www.menards.com/....
No Copyright Infringement Intended

To my delight, I was able to watch the inaugural mass of Pope Francis I.  Just as one does not simply walk into Mordor, nor does one - at least not this one - simply turn off such an important event.  Before I knew it, 5:00 AM had arrived.

Round two:  let's try this again.  After ninety minutes, and then two hours, I woke up at 7:00 AM and had plenty of time to get ready and arrive at the networking meeting at 8:30; however, being there and "being there" were two entirely different things.  Although I was not as engaged as usual, I was able to meet some nice people and take some good notes from the guest speakers.

The afternoon and evening have been a complete waste though, and I hope to get some rejuvenative sleep tonight and have something more substantive to share on Wednesday.

This has happened to all of us.  If you would like to tell me about one of your experiences, please feel free to share it in the comments below.

PS:  Yesterday's blog entry had a Flesch-Kincaid Grade Level of 12.6  Even with the Robert Burns quote, this one comes in at 8.5.  Sorry about that.  I am clearly very tired tonight!

My Thoughts on Same-Sex Marriage

"Golden Wedding Rings on White Background"
http://www.publicdomainpictures.net/....
Photo Credit:  Petr Kratochvil
Public Domain

If you had asked me twenty years ago what my thoughts were on same-sex marriage,  I might have said some things that were not particularly charitable toward the more than 11.7 million Americans who identify as LGBT.

I attended private Catholic schools from kindergarten through my senior year of high school, and my recollection of that time is that some people, including myself on occasion, would use the term "gay" as a slur.  Two particular students in the grade just above mine would use far more graphic terms.

The passage of time has resulted in some personal illumination, stemming from four specific sets of circumstances.

I was married to - and have long since been divorced from - a young woman who must not have been paying attention in her high school health classes, as I think she believed that AIDS was something that could be transmitted through casual contact.  Her particular brand of homophobia was one based on fear, whereas her father's stemmed more from contempt.  He was one of those "God made 'Adam and Eve,' not 'Adam and Steve'" types.  That expression has never seemed particularly inventive to me, especially not when he used it in reference to Jimmy Kimmel appearing in a dress on "Win Ben Stein's Money,"  and that he made the comment during a "meet the parents" dinner that my parents hosted.  Just as a matter of record, I should point out that his application of various "-isms" was not limited to sexuality.  For example, he also referred to people from the Middle East as "sand n*****s."

An Evening of Burlesque
http://www.guildhallartscentre.com/....
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The next three ultimately tie together and are provided in a non-linear timeline.

One of my closest friends has an affinity for the LGBT community.  It was a topic that we did not discuss in as detailed a level as we should have, but I fully understood that it was important to her.  As she is someone whose opinions hold great value to me, I reconsidered my beliefs on an ongoing basis, ultimately coming to appreciate that love is love.

I have several friends in the burlesque community who are gay and lesbian.  These people have become very important in my life over the course of  the last few  years, and I want to extend to them every manner of respect that I can.  In many cases, to know the performers is to know their significant others as well, and I have had the fortune to get to know several of the couples on an actual first-name basis (as opposed to stage names).

Minnesotans United for All Families 2012 Yard Sign
https://www.facebook.com/....
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As much as I love my friends, however, the single biggest catalyst in re-framing my thought process has been the fact that I have a first cousin who is a lesbian.  She and her wife have been together for six years, first as girlfriends, then as engaged partners, spouses, and now... mothers!  I know  firsthand what it is like to be in an unsuccessful heterosexual marriage, and when I observe the love that my cousin and her wife have for each other and for their son, I can't possibly say that there is something "wrong" with them.  Love is love.  My failed marriage had legal recognition, while their successful one does not.  There are, in fact, 515 ways that their marriage does not have the same rights, so they have to go through legal avenues in advance to ensure, for example, such things as hospital visitation rights in the event that one of them should become ill.

Spurred on by my love and respect for my family members, my friends in the burlesque community, and countless individuals from throughout the state whom I shall never meet,  I chose to volunteer during the 2012 election cycle for a political action committee called Minnesotans United for All Families, working in opposition to the Minnesota Marriage Amendment:

Shall the Minnesota Constitution be amended to provide that only a union of one man and one woman shall be valid or recognized as a marriage in Minnesota?

I am proud to say that the organization's tireless efforts resulted in a victory, by a margin of 52.56% to 47.44%.

With Minnesota Vikings Punter Chris Kluwe
Photo Taken on Election Day - November 6, 2012

Although I used the term "LGBT" (Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual, and Transgender) above, another more inclusive term might be "LGBTQIA," which the University of Missouri-Kansas City defines as "Lesbian, Gay, Genderqueer, Bisexual, Transgender, Transsexual, Queer, Questioning, Intersex, Ally, and Asexual."

I far prefer the term "ally" over "straight," simply because the latter term suggests to me that all other orientations deviate from a norm, that they are somehow less-than-straight, perhaps even "crooked."  I got to meet a famous ally last year on Election Day - Chris Kluwe, the punter for the Minnesota Vikings - who released a letter on September 7, 2012 indicating his support for same-sex marriage rights.

Representative Karen Clark (left) and
Senator Scott Dibble (right) on 02/27/2013
http://bigstory.ap.org/photo/....
Photo Credit:  Jim Mone, Associated Press
No Copyright Infringement Intended

This matter is being discussed in our State House once again.  In light of the Constitutional amendment measure having been defeated, chief Senate sponsor Scott Dibble and chief House sponsor Karen Clark (along with additional sponsors in each chamber) have launched an effort to legalize gay marriage in the State of Minnesota.  Several elected officials within the Republican Party have voiced their strong opposition to the matter, but Governor Mark Dayton (himself a Democrat) has voiced his support.

People are speaking against the motion with language highlighting tradition, religion, the need for children to have both a mother and a father, et cetera.

I am not a theologian, politician, lawyer, doctor, parent, or many other things; however, one thing that I am is a friend and a family member, and I want people who are close to me to be able to exercise the same rights and privileges that I can, and that their love can be recognized by the State of Minnesota.  Love is love.

I am apprehensive to allow comments on this entry, but I will trust that people will respect my opinion, even if they do not agree with it, and that individuals will not engage in hostile cross-chat with others.  Thanks in advance.